Yes, Angelica 🙂 still a little too not over two … TWO … shoe pics posted by David… somebody pinch me! LOL
But I believe the longer Instagram message that went along with it needs a full doctoral thesis to parse the subtext… since I am currently working on my M.A. (Masters of Archieology), I will give it a go.
Here are my footnotes (get it? *snort*)
1. He said “took” not “I gave away” or “I decided to share” but they “took” … I’m picturing two guys in balaclavas trying on a bajillion scarves and skinny jeans.
2. “Just about all of my clothes” — not just a T-shirt here or a Ford Day jacket there, but JUST ABOUT ALL OF MY CLOTHES!!! What the heck did they think he was going to wear when he got home, more suits and ties?
3. “while I was gone” — I imagine it went something like this?
Friend: “pssst, he’s in the car, let’s MOVE!”
Brother-in-law: “But they’re still idling, he could’ve forgotten something and run back in!”
Friend: “No time, they’re running late… you take the closet, I’ll take the bureau.”
Brother-in-law: “No, I’ll take the bureau, it’s got his Mr. Rogers T-shirt.”
Friend: “Bro, he took that one with him.”
Brother-in-law: “Dang him, SO selfish!”
Friend: “I know right!”
Brother-in-law: “Dibs on the cool potato sack cowl-neck thingie.”
Friend: “Um, ya, you can have that one.”
4. “(I let them)” — added only so none of us would call the police for him.
5. “I have run out of stuff to wear” — aha, the mystery of Belt-Gate is solved!
6. “Luckily” — as if this magic suitcase appeared out of nowhere full of emergency items for Mr. Wardrobe-challenged.
7. “There was a suitcase of things from the Philippines” — once again, Philippines and Josh Bradley to the rescue!
8. “Like these Bench shoes” — that will work really well come winter.
9 & 10 “Thanks @kariontour for keeping the suitcase safe! — why do I picture Kari holding a fiery torch in one hand and a machete in the other, arms outstretched defending the little suitcase against a pack of wolves.
Or a bomb going off and Kari flinging her body over the suitcase so not one cute polo shirt got singed!
Or a tornado whirling through Apopka and Kari flinging the suitcase down the root cellar, jumping in with it and slamming the trap door shut just in time!
Or maybe just dusting it now and then.
11. “thanks #Bench” — well played, Archuleta, well played. (and look at you there using hashtags like you invented them)
12. “guess I’ll have to stop being stubborn” — what, you, David, stubborn? Had no idea.
13. “Buy more clothes eventually though” — steer clear of men’s capris.
14. I’m glad I’m not the only one who takes pictures of my shoes!
What do you guys think? Reading too much into this? 🙂
So now we have a barely-there-hair morning person who likes watching sports, being a sassypants and live tweeting? WHAT DID YOU DO WITH OUR D’ARCH??!!!
— David Archuleta (@DavidArchie) June 18, 2014
— Jazzy Archuleta (@jazzypwns) June 18, 2014