Category Archives: Utter nonsense

The actual uncensored @DavidArchie Teenage Dirtbag photos (not really)

Okay, so David posted this TikTok following the “Teenage Dirtbag” trend. Dude, missed opportunity! Here are the pics you should’ve used to show the world your Teenage Dirtbagness. Exhibit A: From your debut album cover shoot. It screams “I may … Continue reading

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1st Annual @DavidArchie Pillow Ranking

Does anything capture the mood of this pandemic more than hiding under the covers surrounded by pillows?? Just me? mkay. On David Archuleta’s birthday today, what could be a better time to rank our King’s preference for fluffy, cottony cushions? … Continue reading

Posted in Special event, Utter nonsense | Tagged , , | 4 Comments

.@DavidArchie’s other new book (not really)

Okay, so we all know David Archuleta is releasing a children’s book called My Little Prayer soon (woooot!!!) … [note: if you’ve fallen, got trapped under something heavy and haven’t ordered it yet, do so HERE.] But did you know … Continue reading

Posted in Book review, Utter nonsense | Tagged , , , | 15 Comments

Sneak preview of #LosinSleep … ish

Sorry, guys, I could not resist! * hides* … seriously though, how excited are weeeeeee???????!!!!!!!

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Come sing our special @davidarchie TikTok song!

To celebrate the momentous occasion of David Archuleta’s new little blue TikTok checkmark, I invite you all to sing the following, tune to tune of Paralyzed! Or not, up to you, really. I hold on and I should let go … Continue reading

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Actual customer service call to the new David Archuleta Shop (not really)

Hello, is this the new David Archuleta Shop? Why yes it is, how can we help you? I’d like to order the item pictured above, please. The jacket? Sorry, that’s not in our inventory. No, not just the jacket, everything … Continue reading

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Leaked report on @DavidArchie’s face reading (not really)

As you can see from David Archuleta’s insta stories, he was very very very busy this weekend. But not too busy to get his face read. Yes, it’s a thing. Learn more here. Fortunately, our ace investigative team* here at … Continue reading

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David vs Dahveeeed: A story of two album covers

Yes, of course these two covers depict the same person… or do they?? 🙂 On Winter in the Air, David looks up, dreamy, reflective, thinking back to that 5-star Yelp review he can’t wait to check out. On Navidad, Dahveeeeed … Continue reading

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Sneak peek inside the Mystery Box! (not really)

. Wow, sold out already! Not surprised because our crack team of investigative creepers, I mean, reporters,* has discovered what’s in the Mystery Box! Clue: It’s five of the items below. Test your best guess! Or, what’s your guess?? Act … Continue reading

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POLL: What the what?

So what do you think David was doing here: . . What do you guys think?? What else do you think he was doing? . Full action video: . @DavidArchie sisters questioning him about which character would he be if … Continue reading

Posted in Utter nonsense | Tagged | 12 Comments