You may have heard of “Beyoncercise” and “Rihannacise“… exercise classes inspired by those iconic singers’ moves… well, now we have… ARCHIECISE!
Let’s get you started on the latest fitness craze to hit the fandom since PX90!
Pull on that Invincible T-shirt, hydrate with Fiji water, and push play on those Groove Songs!
Move 1: The Boomerang
Grab one of your 18364380 copies of Postcards in the Sky, hold firmly with two hands and move through the air like you just don’t care.
Move 2: The Target
Find a wide-open space in your favourite department store, shoo away any actual shoppers, and stretch out your leg and torso muscles on the left, then the right. Beware carpet burns… and store security.
Move 3: The Hopscotch aka The So-Adorbs-It-Might-Just-Kill-You
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Find yourself an oh-so-flattering yellow vest and some charming young folks and hop your way to total ArchuFitness! (Pro tip: Holding a cap in your hand improves balance.)
Move 4: The Point
I don’t know about you but I mumble the Lord’s name in every workout… usually just before I pass out. This move is perfect for stretching, warming up, cooling down or pointing out a spot on the ceiling where someone flung their gum. Do 10 reps of 5 each side… and if you’re really limber, try it with your feet.
Move 5: The Wind Tunnel
Head on over to your friendly neighbourhood wind turbine, stand in front of it and try not to be blown out into the ozone. Great core workout.
Move 6: The “Not a yes sir, not a follower…have a seat in the foyer, take a number”
Get your Thunder thighs in shape with these signature moves… and if you don’t know them by heart already after hitting replay on every Thunder video known to man, shoo, be gone, leave your fan card at the door. Pfffffft.
Move 7: The Plank
This is a tough one, designed to “kick your little booty,” to quote the man himself. (Cap and plaid shirt optional.)
Move 8: The “OMG I Can’t Believe He Just Did That!”
You need the perfect shoes for this one… and the graceful elegance of a gazelle. May the force be with you.
Move 9: The Signature Twirl
If you’re afraid of either parachutes or airplanes… or are an actual ballerina dancing on a wire… I’d avoid this move. If you do try it, keep away from stairs and airport lounges.
Move 10: The Up All Night
You will be up all night … in pain… if you don’t do some warmups before trying this advanced level move. Ideal for workout studios on groovy rooftops with a group of super friendly strangers.
Move 11: The Viking
Get your groove… and your viking helmet… on for this fun move targeting the gluteous maximus ….and minimus. Fling those hair flips to feel the burn… make sure there’s no one behind you.
Move 12: The Elevator
My personal favourite, eh. 🙂 Pretend you’re alone dancing in the elevator of life and just go with the flow till you’re feet are back on the grouuuuuund. A+ cardio.
Move 13: The “Kill Me Now With This Cuteness”
Great upper body workout, this move is simply 🤗🤗🤗. (If your cheeks hurt from smiling, ice every 20 minutes.)
Move 14: The Extreme Hunkerdown… like, right down
Yoga mat and knee pads required. Do NOT try this on a giant exercise ball.
Move 15: The Salsa… TRY AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!!
WARNING: For professional Archieciser Instructors or Advanced Trainees only! May cause muscle pulls, vertigo, alopecia, and severe concert withdrawal. YOU HAVE BEEN DULY WARNED!!!!
p.s.
Final Master Class
Try these moves… if you dare! 🙂
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How about you guys?? Which ones have you tried so far? Seen any results?
Gifs mostly from the lovely and amazing Tina.
Brb, have to go ice down my cheeks.
ROFLOLOL
And let’s not forget to add this great arm, hip and leg exercise to the list. I get tired just watching!! Lol
Excellent addition to the program, Shirley! 🙂
Fantastic!!! Amazing!! Very good!! I’m crying so smiling!!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂
👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼
Bahhhhhhhaaaaaaaa
I must start these moves ASAP…….
Thanks for the laugh TOfan!!!
My kind of exercise routine, haha. Thanks for introducing me to Archiecise, LOL. Some excellent body moves here, like the ‘Boomerang’, think I’ve got that one mastered now. May just move on to the ‘Point’ now. 🙂
Thanks for the fun and the humour!
I’ve pulled a muscle just watching. Will need to nurse it so I’ll be in fine concert-form this month. Critical.
Good stuff. 🤣
Sandy?? Yay!!!
Well, I did get my workout today–aerobic laughing, always a healthy experience for both the mind and body. Thank you Deb, and also thank you to your co-conspirator and gif maker extraordinare Tina.
Pepper, you and I are in exactly the same place in our Archiecise journey. After The Point I propose mastery of the much more advanced Elevator. Disco with the flow, y’all. I will neither confirm nor deny doing disco line dances in college.
Didn’t David hurt his back doing that Signature Twirl? His incredible energy expenditure on stage has always awed me, and that was before the more recent, breathtaking, killer shows.
Finally, during my Olympia meet and greet with David, I start of kind of dancing to the music on the tape. David joined in! I danced with David Archuleta!! Okay, for 20 seconds, but long enough for Harvey to name it as his favorite moment of the meet and greets.
Or was that Yakima?
Yakima confirmed. That’s how shaken I was by the experience, I didn’t even know where I was.
That’s awesome, Ms. B.! 💃🏼🕺
I hope this link works, it’s a really moving personal story from someone who heard Invincible at Tuacahn just when she needed to (thanks, Tina, for the heads up):
https://m.facebook.com/collette.clove/posts/2262276923798840
FLAIIIILIIINNNNGGGGGG (p.s. highly recommend headphones!)
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😍😍😍
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I love Canada. Do you take retirees?
Of course! ❤️
A little (or a lot) late but David’s random singing was beautiful. I hope he does more of it. Unshaven or not, all good either way. 🙂
….and that Facebook story,,,,really lovely to read.